angela_n_hunt | Entries tagged with rattle that lock

Originally published at Curse & Quanta. Please leave any comments there.

Floating Star

Mucha ate my brain on this one.

* * *

Could not get out of bed this morning, due to being up way too late last night. I’ve been dragging ass ever since.

Campaign video for the Not So Sekrit Projekt is finished and uploaded. Now’s all the other prep work that needs to happen.

Pumpkin would like me to go take a nap, but I have places I need to be in a little bit.

Yeah. That’s all I’ve got.

Originally published at Curse & Quanta. You can comment here or there.

A 2015

This is the amazing thing about working with the same models over the span of years.

You get to not just build a rapport and relationship that deepens as the years pass, but as a photographer, I get to document, well, it sounds cheesy, but here it is. Soul development. It’s not aging. It’s more than that. As the years pass, I’ve seen uncertainties fade away in my camera lens. Others sometimes replace them, but never for long.

It’s capturing time in a silver gelatin plate and pixels and ones and zeroes. Magick, by any other name.

* * *

Pi Day. I made a small peach cobbler.

I’m taking a rest day. Went trail running/moseying with the above featured Redhead yesterday and it took more out of me than I was expecting. And of course, I’m immediately feeling guilty for wanting to take a rest day when I made a point of saying I was upping my activity to five days this week.

Nope. As the Amazing A said, No hurting ourselves.

So I had a really good day yesterday and re-discovered how much I love being outside. How the fuck did I forget that? How the fuck did I forget that I love to climb all the things and look at the world?

It’s really quite distressing.

So.

Here I am.

I want to order sushi to be delivered, a masseuse to come to the house for me, and a housekeeper for everything else. Things to work towards.

Originally published at Curse & Quanta. Please leave any comments there.

Waiting for the Stars to Align

Yeah. What can I say here that I haven’t already said a lot of times before?

So.

Yeah.

* * *

I’m doing better than I was first thing this morning, but only just.

I should be driving to Utah right now. I should be running tomorrow in Zion.

Instead, I am here. It just didn’t work out. It never seems to work out. Any time I want to do something for myself like this, it always bankrupts us or is done at so low a level as to be almost unpleasant because I can never afford really nice accommodations and really excellent food. I’m sick of living a low rent life. This is why I’m so aggro about the Not So Sekrit Projekt. Why I’m refusing to do it on a shoestring. I’m done with that. I am sick and tired of cutting pieces of myself off to be small enough to be comfortable enough and unthreatening enough to people around me.

Tired. I’m just fucking tired.

I hurt, heart-hurt.

Yeah, that would be the hole. Hello.

If I could do anything, I would be getting on a plane right now and heading to Zion. Staying at the nicest place I could get and renting a jeep, toting all of my camera gear and then some. And I would stay for a week, because I’d have someone here to take care of the Ant and the girls.

Fucking hell.

Oh well.

Originally published at Curse & Quanta. Please leave any comments there.

Doesn't Care About Summer

I love this one. Okay, I love them all, but I want a gigantic 30×40 print of this one for the front room.

What?

* * *

Today is a rest day. Chest and triceps feel like they want to drop off. Thank you, Dean, you bastard.

Of course, my idea of a rest day is to putter in the garden. The ground is still fairly wet, so weeding is going easily and it’s a good time to get seedlings in the ground. And fertilize. Believe me, this is resting. For me.

Yes, I am cracked out. But it makes me happy.

Oh, and I need to buy a lawn mower. Grass is actually fucking growing. And green! Thank you, El Nino!

Not So Sekrit Projekt continues to slowly perk. Today I take measurements of the Mouse. If you want to puzzle and guess, the Pinterest board for it is here: Tarot Apocalyptica The stuff that are Amazon links are things that I need, materials, etc. I’m doing it this way because if anyone wants to support by buying it for me, or has one already they don’t need, and wants to be sending it, I would be forever grateful. Call it the pre-crowdfund campaign of this insanity. Which reminds me, I need to figure out what the prop request post needs…

But in the meantime, my garden waits.

Originally published at Curse & Quanta. Please leave any comments there.

Rattle That Lock

By now, you’ve figured out that I’m using lines by David Gilmour to title this series.

It’s because I didn’t know what else to do. And then I started titling as I listened…and it fit all together rather perfectly. Like it always does.

Yeah, she’s naked. But I think you might want to step carefully…

* * *

I keep falling into the Not So Sekrit Projekt. Things keep spooling and I keep having ideas and it just keeps going.

So. Yeah. Feeling hugely energized by the project. Ideas flowing naturally and the best part is that I’m taking it very slow. Taking my time. Not rushing, not trying to stuff as much of it together to get it in the can as fast as I can. Not because I couldn’t pull it out of my ass if I wanted to, but because I *don’t* want to. I want to take my fucking time. If Kirsty Mitchell showed me anything, it’s that part of what makes her work amazing was the time that it took. She spent six years making Wonderland. I may think that some of what she did was not as amazing as I would have done it, but she fucking did it. I’m also thinking that the time was how she got it made.

It’s Jamin and Kiowa talking about how you can make any movie if you’re willing to spend the time. It’s just the two of them and their computers. And they fucking made Ink and The Frame. Chris is making his own science fiction film that looks pretty fucking amazing.

What’s my fucking excuse? Especially when I *do* know a lot of martial artists? Circus people. All of it. I just need to sit down and do it. Music and all.

Sweep the deck clear.

I just want work on on the project and sleep. So, I will bill hours, get chased around the gym by Dean (who is quitting for a new better job, the wonderful jerk!), garden and go on my artist date, and after, that will be my treat.

I had forgotten how wonderful it feels to bury myself in a thing. Fall down the rabbit hole and create. It’s like finding water in the desert after wandering for too long.

Originally published at Curse & Quanta. Please leave any comments there.

5 A.M.

I know.

What am I supposed to do? The Mad Model gives you a fringe vest and says put it on the Amazing A. What? I was gonna say no?

Nope.

Glorious, isn’t she?

* * *

Turned on David Gilmour first thing this morning. I need more of Rattle That Lock. I swear, when life is hard, it’s his voice that gets me through. Back in the day, it was A Delicate Sound of Thunder and A Momentary Lapse of Reason. Learning to Fly still lifts my soul up. One Slip always makes me drive faster. On An Island leaves me wistful for travel.

Poison in the brain this morning, which is why the immediate application of prog rock. I’ve been thinking about promises and a Not So Sekrit Projekt. I’ve been thinking about how we have to Save Ourselves. And how that can hurt like hell at times. Especially for someone like me.

It’s House. It’s Everyone Lies.

It’s from the very beginning of my life and my father never keeping a single promise he ever made to me that was important. Stupid shit like never taking me to Disneyland specifically to take me and not paying for college after he swore that he would take care of it.

That’s the ultimate first betrayal. If you can’t trust your parents to take care of you, who the fuck can you trust? Certainly not the rest of the fallible human world. I loved him, but I could never trust him. I love him still. But look, he couldn’t even stick around long enough to see his grandchildren.

*sigh*

See previous statement about fucking poisonous brain.

So. I went to the gym. Pounded the crazy out of the brain. I need to get boxing gloves, or MMA gloves, so I can work one of the heavy bags.

Sometimes you just need to hit things really hard till the world makes sense again.