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the next one will be worse
Dec. 22nd, 2009 08:31 amWhere storms are discussed and the number of people left standing are starting to be less and less.
* * *
I go on vacation tomorrow. I will be posting, because this is just liberation from the dayjob for a few days and means opportunity to work on the things that actually matter to me. Like getting ready for Santa's visit and starting the large canvas. I'll post process photos.
I feel like I'm coming out of my fog. I think that I was on the worry hamster wheel, because I foolishly thought I was overlooking a solution. But the reality is, I'm not. The current situation just has to be endured. I just have to deal and move on. There's nothing I can change right now, except the things that I am doing. There's no magic bullet. There's no mystical ticket that will get me out of this purgatory.
What I *can* do, is make art. Paint. Write. Edit photos. Work on my manifesto for 2010. Accept that if I mean to be a successful working artist, I need to up my output significantly.
In short, I need to be doing more things that scare me.
Hell, it got me through Sundoor.
I've also reminded myself through mantra that I am enough. This flesh. These bones. This skin. This body, even with the extra weight.
Enough.
Fear is just energy. I'll just use it to walk this Fire.
* * *
I go on vacation tomorrow. I will be posting, because this is just liberation from the dayjob for a few days and means opportunity to work on the things that actually matter to me. Like getting ready for Santa's visit and starting the large canvas. I'll post process photos.
I feel like I'm coming out of my fog. I think that I was on the worry hamster wheel, because I foolishly thought I was overlooking a solution. But the reality is, I'm not. The current situation just has to be endured. I just have to deal and move on. There's nothing I can change right now, except the things that I am doing. There's no magic bullet. There's no mystical ticket that will get me out of this purgatory.
What I *can* do, is make art. Paint. Write. Edit photos. Work on my manifesto for 2010. Accept that if I mean to be a successful working artist, I need to up my output significantly.
In short, I need to be doing more things that scare me.
Hell, it got me through Sundoor.
I've also reminded myself through mantra that I am enough. This flesh. These bones. This skin. This body, even with the extra weight.
Enough.
Fear is just energy. I'll just use it to walk this Fire.
